(my longbow doesn't conceal at all and a quiver full of bodkin-tipped arrows won't fit under a winter coat).
Now guys, don't laugh...
I wear a kilt most of the time (except, of course, during this harsh winter) and plan on strapping it to my upper thigh under the kilt.
I should like a 9MM that shoots sweetly (not a lot of kick), will fit under the kilt strapped to my thigh, and POINTS DOWNWARD.
What do you guys recommend?
I've had my License to Carry (formerly Concealed Handgun License) for 12 years... in that time I've been shot at by a lunatic one time, just this past summer in fact, and I wasn't carrying. Let that be a lesson: make sure you get something you can carry with you all the time. Or alternately, get something you prefer, and then a backup that can be carried even when you're dressed very poorly for CCing. Also you don't have to be in the hood for there to be a nut, I was somewhere you would take your kids without a second thought. And lest anyone mention gun laws, the guy in question is a felon so can't legally possess a gun anywhere in the United States in the first place so he is already ignoring the law. I got a tiny Beretta Pico to go alongside my regular setup just so that I would have something that I could conceal even if I was in shorts and a light T-shirt in the middle of the Texas summer.
If you're manly enough to wear a kilt, I ain't gonna criticize! Pretty damn good concealment option, honestly. You could hide my Mark 23 under there, not that you'd probably want to.
Not sure what you mean by points downward. What's your budget? My go-to recommendation for a 9mm that is extremely well-built, superbly reliable, with very controllable recoil and great accuracy but without a high price would be any member of the Beretta 92 series (M9, M9a1, M9a3, 92FS, 92A1, etc.). Most of them can be had around the $500-600 mark which is very reasonable. M9a3 is the exception at around $800-900 because it's sporting piles of upgrades. If you have big paws like me or at least medium sized ones you will probably like the standard grip. If not, the Vertec grip is much friendlier to smaller hands and has a feel closer to a Colt 1911 or equivalent 1911 clone.
92s, due to high mass for the caliber, their very low bore axis, and the Walther P38-derived locking block system are exceptional with recoil, and can best be described as giving you more of a "push" feeling than a rapid snap. Very easy to control and be accurate with with a little practice.
If you've got a big budget, the HK USP9 is fantastic and features HK's patented recoil reduction system like the rest of the USP line. Think of them as downsized versions of my Mark 23 that are more "normal" size. Like the 92s, it is superbly shootable and has a push feel to the recoil rather than a snap, although for different reasons. The USP is probably one of the most unkillable pistol designs in existence as well and will survive abuse that will destroy other weapons. But, you pay for it in price.
The Sig P22x series (P226, P228, P229, etc.) are pretty good guns, but they have a crazy high bore axis and you'll probably find you need a lot more practice to shoot one consistently and accurately versus their competition. Their price range also puts them in the same price class as the USP, and IMO the USP is superior. Sig is still good quality though generally. Although I do not favor the Sig P320... at all.
If you prefer a more angled grip and light trigger pull with a much more affordable price, HK VP9, Walther PPQ, and Beretta APX are all good options. I'd give the edge to the VP9 as it's a much more durable piece of kit than most of its direct competitors.
There's also the option of Blocks (Glocks) and things like the Springfield XD. They may work for you. You won't find me recommending them. Their price is amazingly affordable. On every single other metric, their competition is better.